Friday, December 4, 2015

Boycotting Mommy Wars Before You Join the Ranks


As a young married woman and soon-to-be mommy I notice a lot more about other families than I used to. I also see a lot of jazz on social media about “mommy wars” and “mommy judging” going on. Although I don’t have little ones of my own yet, I’ve already made the decision that I don’t want any part of that. There are so many great blogs out there that make a great point about (fill in the blank) and are so well written that they *must* be true.

It’s easy to look at other’s lives and assume that doing (fill in the blank) *must* be right because (fill in the blank) is working out fantastically for them. There are truckloads of great ideas and moms/parents are challenged to do all of them because it’s what’s *best* for their kiddies.

My skepticism isn’t founded in the fact that I think anyone and everyone are wrong—however I’m becoming cautious about what advice I’ll praise and what I won’t. Some things work out great for some families and are a disaster for others. Some tactics are perfectly fit for your child, but maybe they won’t work as well for someone else.
I’ve seen so many ideas that I can’t even remember them all (don’t worry, I’ve pinned them for later). But frankly, these are only good ideas. I will take them for what they are and apply them where they fit. However, I haven’t even met my little ones yet. I don’t know their hearts and I don’t know what they’ll need. I will come to understand that quickly, yet slowly when I meet them.  

Those of you who do already know your little sweethearts already know what they need. You know what works for your family and what doesn’t. Sometimes a great idea is only an idea that seems to have great affects but in reality might squelch a better learning opportunity for you and your child.

So yes, seek out information, seek out ideas. Learn all you can to be the best you can. But don’t seek so many ideas that you break your own heart and confidence as a mother. You know what your family needs better than anyone else. Pray for guidance and inspiration. Try things out and bag them if they aren’t working for you.

Move forward and keep learning from the little ones that you are trying to teach. I can guarantee that you will be a better mommy by paying attention to them more than reading up on the latest and greatest ideas.